Children are like tropical plants—they flourish in the warmth of encouragement and wither in the coolness of criticism. However, sometimes kids are not easy to encourage. They are noisy, messy and often make mistakes. So here are some tried and true methods of praising and supporting your children.
1. Catch them doing something right and comment on it! Too often we only mention their negative behavior. (The Illinois Early Learning Project gives more information on this.)
2. Express appreciation when your children are cooperative and helpful. Don’t take their efforts for granted. Even when they are doing something they are supposed to be doing, acknowledge when they are trying to do the right thing. (The Magic of Encouragement: Nurturing Your Child’s Self-Esteem by Stephanie Marston)
3. Praise and encourage a child for his efforts and not natural talent. Research shows that praising natural intelligence or talent may make children overly conscious of their image or become perfectionists. Or it may make them think that because they have natural talent they don’t have to try and may not want to attempt things they aren’t naturally good at. (Click here for an excellent article on this point.)
4. Praise improvement and progress. Nobody is perfect and we shouldn’t expect perfection from our children. Encourage them when they have made any improvement. Click here for more information.
5. Have some fun together. Do something your child enjoys. Have a tea party or watch a movie. Do something silly. Have a snowball fight or play a game of Simon Says. Just doing something fun with your kids will show them that you enjoy their company. Click here for more ideas.
Moms—please share the ways that you encourage your kids! That way we will all get more ideas!
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